PART 15.

Previously, Theresa was telling me she was sick and she really needed some money. However, I already have my mind set on investing with the scam business opportunity that was offered to me from Burkina Faso and I can’t send money right now. Theresa, though, kept pressing me about her dad having $50K. I tried to explain to her that $2 million > $50K, but I don’t think I got through to her. I think what might’ve been the problem is that she thought I didn’t believe her. So with her next email, she sent me a picture of the money, along with her dad’s lawyer’s contact information.

“Honey how are you doing today i have miss you here my love,,,,My love i really need to buy this drugs Okay,,,,My love here is the Email address Okay,,,,,,s**** you can mail me,,,,You will tell him that you are my husband Okay,,,,,My love my problem is that i really need to pay him some money b4 he can give me all this money Okay,,,”

You'd think it'd be easier to keep this money in packs of $100 bills, but I guess Theresa's dad is all about the Andrews.

Honey i hate someone to play with my love,,,,,Honey let you know that i really care about you alot an i will love to be there with you mydear,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,Did you know what i will love to get my Dad money from the lawyer b4 i come to the state Okay,,,,Now i really need you to help me out,,,,An talk to the lawyer Okay,,”

I censored the lawyer’s email address because there’s a lot of dishonest scam artists out there that might try to hit him up pretending to be me. I don’t want anybody trying to rip off my sweet Theresa.

As proven by the picture, the lawyer is indeed holding a large amount of cash that pretty obviously belongs to Theresa’s father. Again though, there was the whole 2 million > 50K issue. But Wait! Just when I thought she suffered from the kind of retardation that wouldn’t allow her to distinguish the difference between amounts, she emailed me and dropped this bombshell on me! Her father owns a Gold Mine! a GOLD mine! I didn’t even know she had a mother.

“Honey,,,,,,My Mom Told Me Today That My Dad Have Gold Company,,,,,But I Have Not Get The Details Of That Company Okay,,,,”

My Reply:

“holy shit! a gold company? saggytits, You’re a gold mine! Do you have any pictures of his gold? Do you have any pictures of your mom, by any chance? (any naked pictures?) is she hot? she must be if she crapped your hot ass out of her birth hole :)

By the way, I hit up the lawyer. I’ll let you know when I hear back from him.

See you soon my little excrement nugget!”

I did email the lawyer, by the way, but I wasn’t hearing back from him. I was starting to get a little frustrated, so I emailed Theresa about it.

“Theresa, what’s up with your lawyer, yo? I hit that dude up like last week and he still hasn’t written me back. Why is he trying to disrespect me like that? What’s that dude’s problem? I ain’t no punk. You tell that motherfucker I ain’t NO Punk, aiight!!? I saw that picture of that cash he’s got for you. He better not be trying to steal that shit. Tell him he’s messing with the KING OF THE PENISES up in this piece!! This ain’t no fuckin around.”

I guess Theresa must’ve passed on my message and it finally scared him straight into emailing me back. I’ll post those emails next time. This update is long enough already and I need to get to the Western Union office before it closes.

(Originally Posted May 14, 2010)

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