Comments for Carlos Valencia. Stand-up Comedy.

Comment on It’s Curtains for Me. by Tracey D.

Tracey D. — Sun, 01 Jan 2012 05:48:23 +0000

Ringing in the new year with you = slightly awkward, yet awesome and warm n’ tingly…

Hat girl #3 (redhead)

Comment on Wisconsin Law Bans Sex with Dead Bodies by carlos v

carlos v — Tue, 28 Jun 2011 20:06:20 +0000

Comments left on original post by Mike Storck , Joe Zimmerman and Ian Guthrie: Mike Storck... that is bullshit. first they came for the firework masturbators and i said nothing. then they came for the people who have sex while listening to recordings of gunfire and i said nothing.. when they came for the necrophiliacs there was no one left to speak up for me... Ian Guthrie... I'm with Carlos man. All of us people that say we don't mind a girl that is a dead fuck, we are all actually just unenthusiastic necrophiliacs. And to think this whole time people thought that we were just tolerant of girls that are lazy in bed. Joe Zimmerman... Yeah, first gas prices, and then this. Whoever is making the drive to Wisconsin really must just love doing comedy, because that is asking a lot.

Comment on Tapeworm of the Vagina by carlos v

carlos v — Mon, 27 Jun 2011 04:58:20 +0000

Pretty much. I always puke right after I eat my pussy so it makes no difference to me. Is it really bulimia if you can’t help throwing up?

Comment on Tapeworm of the Vagina by Aaron Peachtree Phillips

Aaron Peachtree Phillips — Mon, 27 Jun 2011 03:22:52 +0000

Does this mean I can eat with my pussy and not gain as much weight? Cause I’m so in….

Comment on Tapeworm of the Vagina by carlos v

carlos v — Fri, 24 Jun 2011 09:23:47 +0000

Comment left on original posting by Matt Davis: Matt Davis... i often masturbate to your scribblings... my tapeworm however prefers reruns of Maude.

Comment on My Date with Lindsay Lohan by carlos v

carlos v — Fri, 24 Jun 2011 09:09:00 +0000

Comments left on original post by Joe Zimmerman, Paul Hooper, and Matt Davis: Joe Zimmerman... I though the Gap was where white people go to spend money on material goods. Oh snap, Get it?!?! Down for the count!! Paul Hooper... Very reminiscent of Tim Kidd's 41st birthday bash. Also very reminiscent of Matt's reaction to your 4 of a kind. Also very reminiscent of the night I wore a wig and fell asleep blowing you. Anyway you look at it. Great Times!!!! Matt Davis... Thank for shedding light on this.. Paul and I had gone rounds about it the last few days. i don't follow the whole "gap" thing at the end, but I'm sure it was some sort of coded message. damned latiners.

Comment on Fuck Me With Your Cheeto Penis! by carlos v

carlos v — Fri, 24 Jun 2011 08:44:38 +0000

Comment left by Matt Davis on original post:

Matt Davis

I am offended by this recent trend in marketing… the good people at Cheetos have gone too far…. penis shaped cheesey snacks? doesn’t anyone believe in our lord and savior anymore?
On a side note i totally know what you mean about the whole “sucking the flavor out of those little cheese manrods of goodness, but in a totally Hetero way” meet me in the 2nd stall on the left in the 3rd floor mens room.

Comment on Homo Milk by carlos v

carlos v — Mon, 20 Jun 2011 03:54:03 +0000

Comments left by Matt Davis and Joe Zimmerman on the original posting: Matt Davis: I always thought homogenized meant that it came from white cows. Now I fear I may have been drinking the milk of an inferior breed. Joe Zimmerman: Or maybe it's just gay milk. And you drank a gallon of it? For my money, it doesn't get much more homo than drinking an entire gallon of gay milk.

Comment on Christian Teens Rock! by carlos v

carlos v — Mon, 20 Jun 2011 03:49:32 +0000

Notable comment left by Kerry White on the original posting:

Kerry White

Did you lure him to a lunch date and ply him with the sacrement to the point his inhibitions were erased enough to agree to having a peeled rutabaga shoved up his ass for an unexpected photoshoot to be included in a “very special” Christian Teens Rock Blog? I hope so cause using an unpeeled one would just be, well…sick.

Comment on Comedian Rankings 4: The Fall of the Mighty by carlos v

carlos v — Mon, 20 Jun 2011 03:47:42 +0000

Quick Update: “Fat, bearded, belligerent Carlos” was in fact not far behind.*

*see Carlos c. 2011