MTV Shocked People They Pay To Be Stupid Die
All (some) joking aside, MTV says they are “shocked and saddened” by Shain’s death. If they meant that as an April Fools joke then kudos to them, they got me and you can dismiss the rest of this post. But if they didn’t…
I’ll actually give them “Saddened” because it might kill the show and they will again have to go through the process of rounding up another crew of young stereotypical idiots to exploit. But “Shocked“? If you can muster the fortitude to sit through the contrived script one of the cast members pushes her education to the limit to read, on the show’s introductory two minute trailer you will see bonfire explosions, reckless four-wheeling, people jumping off bridges, rolling down hills inside a tire, roof diving into the back of a dump truck pool, flying off giant ramps in inner tubes, and judging by the copious amounts of alcohol featured on the show I’m gonna venture a guess that a lot of these stunts weren’t necessarily performed sober. This guy dying is about as shocking as hearing a man who finds Kathy Griffin funny is a homosexual.
By the way, I’m all for people doing idiotic things as long as the only people they are harming are themselves. I do plenty of it. My only issue is with MTV’s hypocrisy. Granted this isn’t surprising coming from a network that though naming itself after it plays barely any ‘music’ at all, but you can’t promote that kind of behavior and then turn around and say you are shocked to hear this guy left a bar at 3AM to go “off-roading” and was later found dead. Well I guess you can, and they did. In their defense, they kinda have to. Otherwise they would have to admit to being an accessory to a man’s death, and when was the last time a corporation took responsibility for anything? That would be as unexpected as a redneck from West Virginia not dying after leaving a bar at 3AM to go off-roading.
I’m going to produce a show called “HEROIN HOUSE” where I encourage junkies to grow opium in the backyard, equip the basement with a laboratory, and provide them an endless supply of spoons and syringes. And when one (or ten) of them dies after Season 1 my statement will go something along the lines of:
“Yup, sounds about right. Don’t worry America, we’ve already called somebody up from the Development League. Once you feel you’ve done enough feigned grieving to impress your friends make sure to come back and watch more idiots die for your entertainment pleasure.“